"Jan Ashely is here, Father Gallagher."
I pressed the button on the intercom.
Thank you, Sister Mary Magdalen. Send her in."
I watched Jan enter, closing the door behind her. What was I to do with the child, I wondered? I'd known her all her life, since she was born the daughter of my two childhood friends. I had babysat her in her infancy, studying for my theology courses as a favour for my friends. I had watched her blossom and develop from a baby to a toddler, a child, and then had welcomed her to Martyr's Blood school as a student. As a friend of the family, as her friend, as the headmaster of the school, as her religion teacher and father confessor, I had guided her development. And now for her to do this!
I looked at the girl standing before my desk as she adopted the position of a student waiting upon those in authority, standing upright and attentive with her palms pressed together between her breasts in an attitude of prayer and penitence.
"You sent for me, Father?"
I pulled open my desk drawer and pulled out a thick stack of papers,
photographs and computer printouts.
"I'm teribly upset, Jan. I hardly know what to do. You've betrayed your
family, you've betrayed our school and our church, you've betrayed me."
It was clear from the expression on her face that she was shocked, astounded to be found out, and probably angry at herself for the mistake which had led to her disocery, but the school's Catholic discipline stood her in good stead, and she remained in the proper position, not moving.
"The dorm mother went into your room to deliver a package which had arrived for you. She couldn't help noticing something sticking out from under your bed, so of course she thought to tidy it away for you. You can imagine how absolutely shocked she was to discover this obscene, blasphemous photograph!"
"Naturally, she took it right away to the Dorm Master. He investigated further, and discovered more filthy photographs under your bed. Look at this! A woman shamelessly displaying her naked body, God's gift to the privacy of the marriage vow! Shared like a harlot without the canctity of Matrimony!"
"Who is this woman, this girl, this child? Why is she so wanton, and why do you have the photograph? Has she corrupted you? Or, I dread to think it, are you responsible for the sin of her downfall?"
"The shocking thing is, it gets worse. This young woman, obviously not old enough to be married, and clearly not wearing a ring on her finger, is handling the genitals of a man! And flicking it with with her tongue! I'm absolutely disgusted! I didn't realize loose women did such filthy things! I can't imagine how she can endure the touch of her pure mouth to such a dirty part of the object! The tongue upon which she places the Holy Eucharist she receives from the hand of her priest, touching a part of the body created by God to eliminate fluids from the body and to deliver His seed to the womb of his wife!"
"And the man! Who is this lost soul, who allows his body to be sinned upon in
this way? Or is he the agent of Satan who made her do it?"
"Worst of them all! Spilling his seed!"
"Filthying her mouth with his dirty excretions! Look at it spilling onto her body! She can't hold it in her mouth! I can see by her face even she feels disgust at this point!"
"And look! What's that bright metal spot in her mouth? She's defiled her consecrated body with one of those disgusting holes modern people are poking in themselves!"
"Who are these people, Jan, and why do you have these filthy photographs? Why are they in your posession at all? And why, oh why, have you defiled my school by bringing them here?"
"Of course, the dorm master brought these to my attention immediately. I sent for you right away, to get to the bottom of the facts, but your class was off on your field trip for the morning. Where was it? The museum?"
"I had the programming teacher himself investigate your computer. Mr Saunders had his assistant, Matthew, check the central log files to detect your network usage."
"I don't know how you fooled or bypassed the decency programs, but they found you have been regularly visiting filthy web sites. Matthew tells me you have an advertisement, pleading for people to abuse and defile your body at a site devoted to the filthy crime and sin of rape! That you admit loving pain, being aroused by it, that you have inserted needles in your body to celebrate your 18th birthday!"
"Jan, I don't understand how we have failed you, how your Mother and Father have failed you, your relatives and friends, and I."
"There are more photographs in this stack, Jan, pictures of disgusting and unholy activities. And Matthew only printed out a small sample of what he found. He told me there were hundreds of these photographs! They look much like the pictures you have taken with your little digital camera for the school newspaper, the various school club websites. I'm convinced you took those photographs, or that you were present when others took them, with your camera."
"If what Matthew reported finding on that web site is the truth, then you have defiled your body by poking unnatural objects into your flesh, through your skin. Considering the other photographs Matthew found, I am convinced you took pictures of that event too. I insist you show me each and every one of those images, so Matthew and Mr. Saunders can ensure they are eradicated completely from your life."
"Heavans! I never even thought of it! You have that video camera! I beg the saints and angels to pray with me that you haven't used that to make a tape of your unnatural acts! But I fear the worst."
I paused for a moment, gathering my thoughts.
"It will devestate James and Mary to discover what you've been doing, Jan.
Having their daughter expelled from school, in her final year, when she was
doing so well, getting such good marks. You had a full life ahead of you,
opportunities at good universities leading to a satisfying career, but now, I
don't know what's left for you. They'll be heartbroken. And the shame of having
everyone know how they've failed after all their efforts, to bring up a child
into a decent grown woman."